I work remotely, trying to get as much done as possible, but my thoughts aren’t clear. Too many things at the same time, as soon as something is almost done, the next one starts, a picture of you in your head and questions, how are you doing and what are you doing right now? Are you thinking of me too? I’ll continue, read next email, important? still current? Do, it yourself or forward it to a colleague for processing? Note, text, expression? When will I, get the prices for the calculation for the project? No email regarding this yet.It’s already getting dark outside; I can’t do it anymore today. Morning! Yes, I must go back there in the morning, it’s better in the morning anyway!
Are you still at work? Do you have anything else to do tonight? Questions in my head as I sort through emails. Would be nice today, an evening all alone with you, I could make something to eat, a good bottle of wine and candlelight. You kiss me, I kiss you and we look into each other’s eyes.
I look at the screen, still no email with the prices but still eighty emails not read. It’s getting dark now. In between, write to you that I miss you. Ah! I see you wrote me and sent me photos; I look at the photos, read and answer you. Also send you a picture and write that I wish you a nice evening at the cinema, because today you go with friends into Cinema.
I forget to thank you for your wish for a nice Advent evening for me. I have pictures of you and me in my head, wonderful memories. Get on with the work. No, I like, – can, – no more! Morning! I turn off my notebook, shut down and update – yes! Lights out, I look at my cell phone, text you that I love you, need you and want you. I miss you. The next time I can hold you in my arms is getting closer. A single daydream in this period or reality? Sometimes it’s difficult to define the mental, spiritual state within me during the period between the hours I can spend with you and those when we are apart. day-dreamtime.
I’ve just eaten, I’m still watching TV there are still pictures and thoughts in my head, somehow, I’m already looking forward to going to bed later. In my sleep I can dream „right“ about you and „by the way“ is again one night less until we meet again. You are always on my mind because I love and desire you and my longing for you is ever present. Dream and reality, my dream world.
Excerpt from „Sea of longing“ ISBN 978-3-7103-3957-8